Nick Brewer Alone With My Thoughts Again Lyrics

I still never make sense.

Still chilling in the same ends.

Still living in the yard

With my ma and my pa.

It feels really different now I pay rent.

I suppose that a grown up’s

Still looking over my shoulder.

Still living in the past.

Still thinking of older personas.

Still don’t wanna change.

Don’t wanna let go. I’m a doughnut.

And I know but

I’ve come to a point where I’ve got

to make choices that I

don’t wanna make.

Where I’m waiting and waiting.

But now it’s too late to avoid it.

And I can’t even lie

Man I’m half of the guy

That my father is.

I still wonder if he’s disappointed.

He tells me he’s proud

I can tell that he doubts

Every now and then.

And I’m hardly home

eat food then I’m out again.

Mum’s stressed when I’m out

and about with friends.

She prays for my safety

Ever since Rich got slain

and it’s making her crazy.

And I know the feeling.

I still get nightmares

Still think of him daily

Still think of the hate

that fills my mates.

I still thank god that he saved me.

[Chorus:]

I’m alone with my thoughts again.

Alone with the thoughts

that I thought before.

I feel so not sure

So I talk to them.

I’m fighting my thoughts

it’s a war.

And I walk with them.

I’m recording

[?]

See these ain’t just bars that I write.

It’s more like each line’s

a part of my mind.

And I like what I’m starting to find.

[x2]

And I’m still here

I ain’t so far gone, I’m real near.

I still fight parts of my past.

Can’t lie, I still feel fear.

Still driving the same old car

and I still spit the same old bars

about how I been hiding

and how I keep finding

I write what my mind thinks.

‘Cause not a thing’s changed.

I guess my life ain’t exciting.

I rest, I find days so tiring.

I’m tired with nothing to do.

And I still got something to prove.

Still don’t know all the things

that I want to know.

But I know that I still want

to see change happen.

Still reminisce once in a blue.

Still thinking of people I know

and of people I knew.

But it’s crazy the change

that I seen in the place I was raised.

No familiar face on the estate.

I’m hoping, really I pray

most of my mates found truth

in the path that they chose.

‘Cause it’s hard and I know

And I’m not sure what to say

I’m still lost for words.

I still wanna do better.

Sometimes I still opt for worse.

Still trying to put God first.

[Chorus x2]